The Northern 📍

  Does God Hate Me?      I never thought I would ask that question- yet here I am.      Does God hate me? Does he wish to punish me for something I’ve done? Or is it deeper? Does he fear me because he knows what I am capable of doing? I don’t know anymore. I simply am out of options at this point.      My faith is wavering, there is no doubt about it. As per usual, things simply cannot seem to work out. No matter what I say or do, I lose. Every single battle. Every single conversation. The never-ending streak of constantly being unable to pull thru and make something happen is a curse which I have never witnessed before. I am simply incapable of making anything happen from start to finish.        Obviously, that fault lies within myself. That is on me, for being unable to see something thru. However, even the external forces seem to be against all my momentum. Even they seem to be holding me back, not allowing me to r...

  The Ball Is Rolling.      Full Steam Ahead. There is no turning back.      Things are finally in motion which cannot be undone. The ability to move forward, and create momentum, so that nothing can ever hold us down. I must become the master of my own ship. The captain of my own destiny. I must become the individual responsible for all which I wish to receive. The Universe works for me, and it is ready to reward my faith.      Momentum is an addictive thing. Once you begin moving in a certain direction, it becomes more and more likely that the Universe will bend its will. You become a great force of nature, one which cannot be stopped by the outside force. The trick is, to get out of your own way. To allow the world to happen to you, rather than you controlling it. To bend your knee to no one but your own will. We must become true to ourselves and move in a direction which will create the most likely outcome towards our goals. That is ...

  These Nights, We Learn to Love Again.      These Nights. Good times all around. I finally remember what it’s like to be human. To feel. To touch. To love.      Okay, maybe that last one was a stretch. What is love, anyways? Nothing more than a chemical imbalance. And let me tell you- I’ve got enough of those going on as we speak.        Life is funny. I suppose nothing happens at all, until all of a sudden, everything happens at once. Perhaps thats my sign to get back on the horse. To return to society, and become a functioning member of it once again. I must be honest, I do not hate the sound of it. I do not hate the idea of finally being free from my chains, and being able to go out and live once again.        Times have been tough and extremely difficult, no doubt about it. Yet, despite all of the challenges, I remain grateful. Grateful, because I was able to pass thru the eye of the storm, and emerge the ot...

  Do you ever wonder what it’s like to be normal?      Seriously, do you ever think about it? Do you ever sit back and pretend how easy life would be, if you simply folded and did whatever it took to fit in?      Imagine life. Waking up, not having a care in the world. Hurrying up as quickly as possible, just so you can make it to your group of friends. You all work together, in the same environment, tackling the same jobs. I often think of construction as a prime example. A group of individuals, all working together, on the same thing. They all share the same lifestyle, same passion, driven by the same clocks. Wake up early, get to work, grind away, finish your day, home, supper, bed. Like clockwork. Monday to Friday, no days off.      Honestly, it doesn’t sound half bad. It sounds almost, relaxing. Constantly knowing that you have a team of workers, waiting and depending on you, to show up every single day. Every single day, you do nee...