Food for Thought 🍖

 The Heat of The Moment.

    Feel the sweat roll down your back. The heat of it all, pulling across your skin. The very existence of yourself, slowly curling up at the weight of the world from within. The heat of the moment, ready to attack and conquer your every sin.

    Sometimes jumping right in is the only way to truly accomplish it. Overthinking never leads to anything worthwhile. The ability to simply act upon impulse, can be useful. The irony, however, is always taking your time before acting upon it. The constant back and forth between the mind and the heart, in an ever-enduring battle of the wits.

    Thinking too much is a disease. That much, I am certain. One can sit there and think themselves to death, as they continuously evaluate every single angle. Overthinking, over worrying. Over everything, with nothing to show. The ability to simply ignore all that there is around you, and dive in with both feet, is a gift. To know that you may get hit, you may get hurt, but to dive in regardless. To know that the future is not determined by those who sit and think about it, but rather by those who act.

    It shames me to admit that I have been overthinking it. From waking up, to going to bed. Every single step in between, as I attempt to write a perfect story. Instead, I am left with nothing to show for my fruits. My harvest, leaving me empty and dead. The idea that perfection is somehow better than completion. The belief that if I continue to overthink it just once more, then maybe I’ll be able to produce the proper story. A lie, which has been cast upon many men before me, and continues to haunt me as well.

    Action must become second nature. It must become the first response to the situation instead. We live in an age where thinking no longer gets us anywhere. Where thinking about something too deeply can be viewed as a weakness instead. The reality of the world has changed around us. As much as I hate to admit it, the truth remains exactly that- the truth. Society no longer values those who sit around and discuss solutions. They only wish to see those who stand up and take charge. Stand up and lead towards whatever direction they believe most fit. Whatever direction where the outcome will benefit those involved. 

    I’ve wasted too much time simply thinking. Wasted too much time, running around trying to understand. Everything, everywhere, all at once. Attempting to accomplish the impossible, to work within a realm which cannot be seen. The idea of having more, beyond this reality, is a fascinating one. It is one where even the brightest of minds can get caught up in the attempt to understand. To stare into the void, and attempt to understand it. Something out of pure ego, where the individual believes they can overpower a force which has long existed since the beginning of time.

    A brain-dead animal is what society is fighting hard to raise. To create individuals who are simply driven off of action. To move towards something which is fake and non-real. The idea that we can control people and how they act, if we are capable of reducing them to their lowest denominator. To create a world where food, drink and sex are all that matter. Where consumption is the only important factor in ones life. To consume as much as possible, without ever pausing to think deeply about it. To view the world as nothing more than a chest to empty, while we spend our time here on Earth.

    Perhaps that is capitalism in a nutshell. To consume, consume, consume. To constantly strive for bigger, better, newer. The never-ending chase towards money, a form of god which has the power to change ones life forever. To lift one from lowborn to status, within a lifetime. The system itself, designed to have one chase pleasure instead of finding it. 

    I don’t necessarily believe that it’s a bad thing. I don’t necessarily believe it to be good, either. I believe that things like these, systems which have been put into place, are complex. The structures are difficult to understand fully, without being able to see the extremes of both sides being presented. The never perfect, yet always evolving state of the world. My Grade 8 teacher once told me, any man can point out the flaws of a system- it takes a great man to present a solution to it instead.

    I don’t have a solution. To any of this. I don’t know anything anymore. In fact, I wish not to. I wish to be a brain-dead animal, much like society has been attempting to create now for a while. To be driven by pleasure. To be forced out of bed to chase food, drink and sex. To run around, with nothing on my mind but money. To create a monster whose only interest is interest itself. 

    The more I think about it, the colder of a world it sounds. An inhumane world, ran off of somebody else’s dollar.

Perhaps I should quit thinking about it, and just act upon it instead.

        Glory Be,

                    Amen.